Beautiful ones are born

Hi everyone, 
How u doing? 
I'm super excited 'cos its Friday and I finally got my second guest post. Thanks Miztur Moby.
He believes in being a true naija and as such he insisted in a pidgin post (Please pardon this randomness)...
When I was in secondary school, my teacher made me read this book by 'AYI KWEI ARMAH'- The beautiful ones are not yet born...

Honestly, I read it with the intention of passing literature. Well, it's the basis of Miztur Moby's post...Here, he's saying that the beautiful ones are born...
Enjoy!!!!

Abeg make una no vex o..e get one tin wey me go like straighten out wey dey bother me.

Since wey i small na im i don dey find girfrend wey fine scatter,i tel my granma,because na der my parents dey drop me evriweekends wen dem go flex o,anyways she say make i no rush say d beautiful ones r not yet born...smal time cum reach granma cum die o..hian!! I tel granpa(wey don get anoda granchic sharply) after her burial weda im sef go get idea abt dis girlfrend mata,granpa look me for eyes,pat me for back say 'my son focus on ur books,dnt rush by the way the beautiful ones r cumin'.i cum look d granchic wey im cary,den for my mind i cum talk say why im no wait sef,hmm i tel myself say may b im no like fine girls sha,cos i go talk tru,granma no too make am sha.Ehen  Na im i buckle up again,say chai na im b say i go folo for pipl wey go get d most beautiful ones o. E no tey again,granpa pass o...my people..i dey 40 now,i get money and evritin wey pesn need to settle buh pipl stil dey talk say dem neva stil born beautiful ones...my mama now don go tel all our village people say dem don swear for me..i don try xplain wetin granma and granpa talk buh nbdy wan hear my own.i say make i hear una own...and abeg evribdy folo dey talk dis talk sef..abeg doz it min say olofus wey dey around now no fine? Our mama and sistas..even all those girls for those beauty pageants wey dey make our soldiers sef salute.Buh wait o,cum to tink of it, Dem don born me sef na..so na im b say i no fine?..c sweet face,chest..and plenny mor wey una knw alredi.!abeg if u dey read dis nonsense..stand in front of mirror for ur room der or ur neigbour room if no get mirror and tel me say u no fine..mscheeew...na God go punish all those pipl wey dey talk say dem neva born d beautiful ones(xcludin my granpips o..mayb dat time truli dem bin neva born us wey fine)...and ijay don dey eye me sins..and if una c dis girl shape  ehn,choi!

Dis girl be like angel wey God send to cum buy sumtn for am for here..if una see her nya...ehen anyways .i jus cova myself wit prejudice dey wait for 'd beautiful ones' wen dem boku...abeg make una no let anybdy make una tink less of unaselves o..u r d  most beautiful of dem all..abeg make una enjoy d dec knowing dat joor....me i dey go find ijay make we go c mumsi b4 dem cum carry me go babalawo abeg....God bless us all! 

- Miztur Moby™:

So, the beautiful ones are here. Why una dey wait sef? Abi u no fine? 


Thanks a billion for reading. Thanks Mr. Moby...Hugs!!!